The customs house museum in Clarksville, TN was about to become the center of flag desecration controversy before the museum director removed the fried American flags. Although the official reason was that people don’t appreciate their symbol of nationhood being fried, Billy Brian the town spokesperson said “We were more scared that the flags would be consumed. The situation worsened when the fried flag display was placed next to the ketchup bottle display. We did not want any untoward incident to occur and then start blaming people and hence we took pre-emptive action. Moreover who can resist fried stuff with ketchup?”
When asked if they expect any protests from the locales Mr. Brian said “Well the town fair is going to start in a week so most people are primarily focused on it. You know it has the biggest merry-go-round in district. Moreover who cares about freedom of speech or disparaging our national flag, monster truck season is also right around the corner. This season is going to be the best and you better believe it because the poster says so.”
This is C&C signing out from Clarksville, TN (Population 280, welcome board says “Screw civil liberties and your cousins as long as they older than 12”)
Peace
Monday, November 20, 2006
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Dallas wants gays and lesbians
The city officials of Dallas have decided to attract more gays and lesbians into the city. Dick Spooner an official in the Dallas tourism department said “Since the republicans lost the house we figured we would lose the political tourists and in an effort to retain some of them and encourage others we have decided to make Dallas a Gay/Lesbian friendly city, not that it was un-friendly in anyway earlier. More over the transition would be easier as we are already used to cowboy boots and butch women.”
Starbucks, the Seattle based coffee retailer, offered to assist the city by opening more coffee shops in the city. Jean Backrider, the Texas area manager for Starbucks, said that it is key to have a wide variety of confusing coffee types to attract G’s and L’s (Apparently that is the new hip term for gays and lesbians). It is assumed that companies like Pottery Barn and Gucci are to follow suit.
The association of “straight but wear leather pants, cowboy boots and big belt buckles in a city” of Dallas was the first to protest the new stance of the city officials. Robert Dude, a senior member of the association, said “We don’t want to be confused as gays just because we wear leather pants and cowboy boots. We are manly men. Some of our members are being swayed by the concept of getting free drinks but are not aware of the aftermath. We will not put up with this non-sense. We will demand that all gays wear pink boots only. Moreover we are already facing difficulty buying a cup of coffee. I don’t freakin know what a mocha double shot with tangerine syrup and whipped cream means? All I want is a cup of coffee with sugar and yesterday it took me 10 minutes to order my coffee.” Mr. Dude did admit in private that the Mocha double shot was good but it would have been better with pomegranate.
Although most Dallas residents could care less about the new policy there is quite a bit of stir in the political community that god hating liberals are penetrating the last standing fortress of Jesus, Texas. The TV cable news channels, anticipating a battle have already picked sides and experts on the issue.
This is C&C signing out from downtown ft.worth.
Peace
Starbucks, the Seattle based coffee retailer, offered to assist the city by opening more coffee shops in the city. Jean Backrider, the Texas area manager for Starbucks, said that it is key to have a wide variety of confusing coffee types to attract G’s and L’s (Apparently that is the new hip term for gays and lesbians). It is assumed that companies like Pottery Barn and Gucci are to follow suit.
The association of “straight but wear leather pants, cowboy boots and big belt buckles in a city” of Dallas was the first to protest the new stance of the city officials. Robert Dude, a senior member of the association, said “We don’t want to be confused as gays just because we wear leather pants and cowboy boots. We are manly men. Some of our members are being swayed by the concept of getting free drinks but are not aware of the aftermath. We will not put up with this non-sense. We will demand that all gays wear pink boots only. Moreover we are already facing difficulty buying a cup of coffee. I don’t freakin know what a mocha double shot with tangerine syrup and whipped cream means? All I want is a cup of coffee with sugar and yesterday it took me 10 minutes to order my coffee.” Mr. Dude did admit in private that the Mocha double shot was good but it would have been better with pomegranate.
Although most Dallas residents could care less about the new policy there is quite a bit of stir in the political community that god hating liberals are penetrating the last standing fortress of Jesus, Texas. The TV cable news channels, anticipating a battle have already picked sides and experts on the issue.
This is C&C signing out from downtown ft.worth.
Peace
Scottsdale - Clean and white
I have been in a writing coma for the last three months. One of the reasons for the coma was because of my new job. Anyways I decided to move to Phoenix as my new job does not have a restriction on where I live. Scottsdale, a suburb of Phoenix, is where I chose to move to and it is a very clean place. My friend and I hit the town every once in a while and I was disturbed by the uniformity of the society. Last night sitting in a trendy place called "33" I was looking around to see some sort of a color variation amongst people but could not find any. The only black people I saw were on TV.
I think uniformity amongst people reduces friction but should color be one of the factors? I will not go into this cliched rant about equality of people ir-respective of color but make a few points about diversity that are critical to a good society.
01. Cultural awareness in one of the key factors that allows people of various backgrounds co-exist peacefully. Now Scottsdale is full of rich white people and it is very likely that most of them would in decision making positions in the future. Hence I think it is important that these kids be exposed to a variety of cultures. I'm not talking about the one hour visit to the ghetto but a some sort of an interaction with the others (Others implying cultures, classes, countries etc).
02. There is no chance that Chad's parents are going to live in west side Detroit or Jamal's parents in Bloomfield hills. The best chance for amalgamation takes place in colleges and it is critical for schools for encourage this cross cultural exchange of thoughts. Thanks to sports a number of schools do boast of a decent mix of students and hopefully it will help the future generations.
So people stop dreaming about a colored or a female president, look at reality and start working towards an amicable solution.
Peace
I think uniformity amongst people reduces friction but should color be one of the factors? I will not go into this cliched rant about equality of people ir-respective of color but make a few points about diversity that are critical to a good society.
01. Cultural awareness in one of the key factors that allows people of various backgrounds co-exist peacefully. Now Scottsdale is full of rich white people and it is very likely that most of them would in decision making positions in the future. Hence I think it is important that these kids be exposed to a variety of cultures. I'm not talking about the one hour visit to the ghetto but a some sort of an interaction with the others (Others implying cultures, classes, countries etc).
02. There is no chance that Chad's parents are going to live in west side Detroit or Jamal's parents in Bloomfield hills. The best chance for amalgamation takes place in colleges and it is critical for schools for encourage this cross cultural exchange of thoughts. Thanks to sports a number of schools do boast of a decent mix of students and hopefully it will help the future generations.
So people stop dreaming about a colored or a female president, look at reality and start working towards an amicable solution.
Peace
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